Avoiding Common Pitfalls as a Student

The learning process can often present challenges. At times, the student sees challenges as impossible to overcome; this results in the decision to quit their musical journey entirely. Here are some of the most common pitfalls students encounter and ways to surpass them:

Don't Worry About Being "Good"

Ever notice when children play for the sake of playing that they have the most fun? The nature of playing when playing has no goal is very much different from playing that has such attachments. Ever observe what happens when one of the kids or an adult judges the playing qualitatively? 

Now more than ever, the notion that one has to be particularly good at an activity pervades our society. In turn, the pressure we end up placing on ourselves to be seen favorably by others can slowly turn an activity we love into an unpleasant experience. 

Some students consider the pressure to be good, while others (e.g., yours truly) are carefree but change perspectives later.

When I decided to play the guitar at 11 years old, I never considered being good or bad at it. Such an estimation never even crossed my mind. As a result, playing the guitar was fun, intriguing, and exciting. By approaching music this way, it never became a chore, nor was I constantly wondering what others thought of my playing. 

Not until later did I find out how much pressure I eventually placed on myself. By 19, I decided to become a perfectionist; this alone nearly caused me to quit what I loved entirely. Never was I satisfied with anything I played. How could I be? I was holding a giant club over my head, just waiting to beat myself whenever I made a "mistake."

Fortunately, I managed to give up on this and began to question whatever made me decide to become a perfectionist in the first place. (I had read that one of my favorite guitarists was a perfectionist, so I should be, too.) 

When I reached the point of either quitting or continuing, I recalled how the fun had vanished from when I was a kid first starting. So I decided to return to an approach free of worry about judgment from my ego or others; this relieved all pressure, and the enjoyment returned immediately.

Whether you are a beginner or a longtime musician, realize the enjoyment you experience playing. Naturally, we want continuous improvements; this will happen without worrying about sounding good. In fact, the youngest students tend to advance faster because they avoid this pitfall; they delight in just playing and naturally become more proficient over time.

Compare Yourself to yourself

Another source of consternation for students that may (and does) lead to quitting is when they realize that they do not play as well as others they know or will never sound exactly like their favorite guitarist(s).  

Many students have expressed how frustrated they feel because some personal friend or acquaintance is much more advanced. Often these comparisons could be more reasonable. For example, a student recently told me she would never be as good as her friend who plays. This student has been playing for about six months; the person to whom she compared herself has played for several years.

She took little comfort when I pointed out this giant difference in playing between her and her friend. When I asked if she got into playing the guitar to outplay her friend, she said, "No, I have always wanted to learn to play." Have you largely enjoyed learning how to play the guitar?" I asked. "Yes, I would have stopped if I didn't," she responded. "So are enjoying playing and learning not enough? Does playing have to be a competition?" She laughed and said, "Yes, it is enough."

We are constantly comparing this to that, so making comparisons to others is very understandable; however, when the student mentioned above realized the impact her comparison had on enjoying learning music, she allowed the fun to return. Music is an art, not a competition. It is about communication, expression, and sharing. 

Your greatest strength is that you are one of a kind; no one is better at being you than you. By simply being yourself, you will avoid the discouragement that presents itself whenever you hear another guitarist who you feel is much better than you will ever be. Instead, focus on learning how to play so the guitar can best express you. After all, no one can better express you, not even the greatest technically accomplished guitarist in the universe.

Look at other guitarists as sources of inspiration, not in a competitive or adversarial sense. 

the Speed of learning

One of the most common remarks I hear from students is that they feel they are learning at a slower-than-usual rate; this is especially common for adults.

99% of the time, the student's growth is average or above average. Surprise is the most common reaction to my assurances to them that they are not deficient or slow learners. When I ask how they determined that they are learning too slowly, they almost always mention an accomplished guitarist who has been playing for many years. 

I point out that those guitarists have spent tens of thousands of hours on the instrument, something ignored by most listeners.

Observing one's own progress is not often all that reasonable because the student uses unreasonable or impractical measuring sticks; this is one reason a competent and honest teacher may be so helpful: the teacher gives you a perspective and feedback that is virtually impossible to obtain from the student's viewpoint.

Students learn more quickly and with far more enjoyment when not worrying about the rate of learning. Much of this is because they are more relaxed when they practice. Stress and anxiety not only take the fun out of playing the guitar but also create a counterproductive condition.

The ease of learning

Another element I did not consider when I began playing was how easy or difficult it would be to learn. All I knew was that I wanted to play; I did what I felt necessary to express my musical ideas more easily. Had I concerned myself with how easy or difficult it was going to be, I almost surely would have quit.

Indeed, other guitarists inspired me, but many things did not come easily to me; they required tons of practice, but the thrill of slowly getting the guitar to sound as I wanted was more than enough to keep me interested. I did not want to be a carbon copy of those guitarists who inspired me. Instead, I tried to understand and execute what those guitarists had mastered because I felt these were ways I could hear myself playing.

Avoid getting caught in thinking how easy or difficult it is to play. If you keep thinking, "Wow, playing the guitar is so difficult," you will feel exactly that. I guarantee that learning will be much easier if you are not constantly opposing yourself. The player needs to assimilate the guitar, unify the instrument, and not treat it as something to conquer. 

"mistakes" are your friend

Know anyone who learned how to walk without ever losing balance and falling down? (If you do, please send me documented footage.)

Do we know how to balance when we stand without failing to balance properly? 

The greatest, most accomplished musicians of all time made many mistakes; while fewer in number and many times undetected by listeners, technical errors continued even when they were at the virtuoso level. 

Rather than fear making mistakes, embrace them; your accuracy and skills cannot improve without them.

play for fun, not for validation from others

Any student I have ever encountered whose primary motivation behind learning the guitar is to impress others has quit within the first year; this is no surprise. After all, who can avoid the ever-increasing pressure created when your music hinges entirely on the hope of receiving favorable reactions from others? 

Instead of trying to impress others, play for sheer enjoyment. A large pitfall forms whenever other conditions are attached to an activity. If the level of fun is insufficient enough to continue, you may want to reconsider playing music.

Everything in Moderation

As students begin learning, many eventually become overwhelmed by how much there is to develop and practice. Some reach the point where the possibilities leave them daunted. Such apprehension can bring much frustration and pressure, making the learning process intimidating.

Consider that students fare much better when they practice fewer things more thoroughly than many things haphazardly. By approaching practice from more of a qualitative rather than a quantitative angle, the student can save themself from anxiety.

Shortly after I began studying with one of my music mentors, I realized that there were hardly enough hours of practice in a day to go through every concept; combining these concepts increased the number of possibilities exponentially. 

When I shared how stressed I felt in not being able to practice every single concept, he told me that it is better to take one concept at a time. Eventually, I could work through all the concepts and maintain a relaxed approach to practicing. 

A traveler who sets out to walk 100,000 steps can become quickly overwhelmed by the sheer number, especially when counting each step. On the other hand, a traveler who takes one step at a time will eventually cover the 100,000 steps and more; the journey will be far more enjoyable and feel much quicker.